• Flying Squid@lemmy.world
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    5 months ago

    Dude, this has been a traditional way for parents to embarrass their adult children in front of their partner for decades. My wife has seen my naked baby pictures without my parents even showing them to her. And I’ve seen hers. What’s the big deal? It’s not like either of us found them sexy.

    • Ilovethebomb@lemm.ee
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      5 months ago

      Chopping part of your child’s dick off has also been traditional for decades, that’s a very poor justification for that behaviour.

    • KillingTimeItself@lemmy.dbzer0.com
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      5 months ago

      it’s still weird (source, i have parents), at least ask your daughter for consent first.

      I’d consider it to be a breach of my privacy otherwise.

      • Flying Squid@lemmy.world
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        5 months ago

        They’re baby pictures. We’re not talking about something erotic here. Naked babies are not some sort of scandalous thing. In most cultures, they’re normal.

        • KillingTimeItself@lemmy.dbzer0.com
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          5 months ago

          i didn’t take them and i didn’t consent to them existing either. Neither did i consent to them being shown to anybody.

          Naked humans are also normal, yet we still wear clothes. babies included, weirdly enough.

          At what point does “naked baby photos” turn to “naked children photos” is my question.

          how about this. You can have your naked baby photos, you just also have to be in the photo and naked as well.

          • Flying Squid@lemmy.world
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            5 months ago

            i didn’t take them and i didn’t consent to them existing either. Neither did i consent to them being shown to anybody.

            Based on that reasoning, I should not show anyone any photo of my child until they were old enough to consent to them being taken.

            You can have your naked baby photos, you just also have to be in the photo and naked as well.

            I’m not embarrassed by my body and if that’s what her partner really wants to see, I don’t care.

            • Ilovethebomb@lemm.ee
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              5 months ago

              Based on that reasoning, I should not show anyone any photo of my child until they were old enough to consent to them being taken.

              This is actually solid advice, especially as far as social media is concerned.

              • Flying Squid@lemmy.world
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                5 months ago

                We’re not talking about social media, we’re talking about the significant other of my child. Or even relatives. I didn’t get my daughter’s permission to take her photo when she was a baby, so I shouldn’t have sent a photo to my father on the other side of the country based on this reasoning.

                • nomous@lemmy.world
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                  5 months ago

                  You’re (wisely) backpeddling now but you said:

                  used to torture children in front of their serious romantic partners brought home for the first time.

                  Things were different when we were kids. It’s a fucked up thing to psychologically abuse your (presumably) teenage kids like that and objectively people know that. (Your daughters) consent in the subject is the only thing that matters. The only reason anyone is giving you a pass is because you’re FlyingSquid, but maybe leave those pictures in the closet until closer to the wedding.

                  • Flying Squid@lemmy.world
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                    5 months ago

                    Oh please. It’s not psychological abuse. It’s “torture” the same way telling the story about the time they told a lady in the checkout line, “I came out of my mommy’s bagina!” when they were three to an adult child’s partner is torture.

                    You show me an example of anyone suffering PTSD because their parents showed their partner baby pictures.

            • KillingTimeItself@lemmy.dbzer0.com
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              5 months ago

              Based on that reasoning, I should not show anyone any photo of my child until they were old enough to consent to them being taken.

              based on that reasoning i shouldnt expose my child to the visual perception of other people who exist outside in the chance that one of them non consensually perceives my child.

              You wouldn’t expose your child naked in public, why would you expose them naked on picture?

              I’m not embarrassed by my body and if that’s what her partner really wants to see, I don’t care.

              that’s great, the implication there is that you’re still showing it to other people, and if we’re talking family and friends, i don’t know many people that would want that.

              • Flying Squid@lemmy.world
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                5 months ago

                You wouldn’t expose your child naked in public,

                How exactly do you think someone changes a diaper at a park?

                • KillingTimeItself@lemmy.dbzer0.com
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                  5 months ago

                  i mean, most people use bathrooms. Considering that human waste is literally a biohazard, i feel like doing anything else would be quite rude at best, and arguably a crime at worst.

                  • Flying Squid@lemmy.world
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                    5 months ago

                    So you acknowledge that I would, in fact, expose my child naked in public. And with good reason. And everyone could see her genitalia when I did.

                    Edit: Oh, sorry, misread. You think you can always make it to a bathroom? You have never had a baby.

        • Ilovethebomb@lemm.ee
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          5 months ago

          Taking photos of naked children isn’t, and shouldn’t, be normal in any culture I’m familiar with, and you definitely shouldn’t be showing them to anyone.

          • Flying Squid@lemmy.world
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            5 months ago

            Well you should get familiar with Finnish culture and then start berating the Finnish guy who chimed in and said it was totally normal.

            You know what an immoral, shithole country Finland is though.

              • Flying Squid@lemmy.world
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                5 months ago

                It’s not my fault that you reply to all of my comments and don’t bother reading other people’s. It’s right there for you to read.

                When are you going to contact lemmy.world admin to have me reported to the authorities for child abuse and the possession of child pornography?

        • x4740N@lemm.ee
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          5 months ago

          DO YOU NOT UNDERSTAND WHAT CONSENT IS

          YOU LEARN IT AT SCHOOL, ITS VERY IMPORTANT

    • ArcaneSlime@lemmy.dbzer0.com
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      5 months ago

      Tbf child marriage is also traditional, Muhammed had a 9yo bride (it’s “ok,” he didn’t have sex with her until she was 11.)

      Defending things based solely on tradition can get pretty weird sometimes.

      • Flying Squid@lemmy.world
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        5 months ago

        That’s a tradition that ended a long time ago. I’m talking about traditions that are ongoing. Also traditions that, despite someone else’s claim, probably don’t cause any psychological harm, at least most of the time.

        • ArcaneSlime@lemmy.dbzer0.com
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          5 months ago

          I think you may be surprised and hopefully disturbed by this UNICEF article.

          Despite a steady decline in this harmful practice over the past decade, child marriage remains widespread, with approximately one in five girls married in childhood across the globe. Today, multiple crises – including conflict, climate shocks and the ongoing fallout from COVID-19 – are threatening to reverse progress towards eliminating this human rights violation. The United Nations Sustainable Development Goals call for global action to end child marriage by 2030.

          So no, it was not “a long time ago.” It’s “hopefully by 2030.”

          Also traditions that, despite someone else’s claim, probably don’t cause any psychological harm, at least most of the time.

          Oh, so as long as you don’t believe the person and can therefore invalidate their feelings without guilt, and it only psychologically hurts “some” people who you I suppose arbitrarily believe over the ones you don’t, it’s fine?

          Not sure I can agree with you on this one.

          • Flying Squid@lemmy.world
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            5 months ago

            Believe what person? Hurts some people?

            I have asked for evidence that it hurts anyone and have not received it.

            • ArcaneSlime@lemmy.dbzer0.com
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              5 months ago

              Also traditions that, despite someone else’s claim, probably don’t cause any psychological harm, at least most of the time.

              Actually you asked for nothing, you made a whole lot of assumptions instead. And

              evidence that it hurts anyone

              Here again you invalidate the feelings of those telling you with their own words that they don’t like it. The evidence they don’t like it is them telling you they don’t like it, you don’t need a scientific paper to corroborate that some people find it objectionable, you just dismiss them because you want to partake in the behavior they find objectionable.

              • Flying Squid@lemmy.world
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                5 months ago

                I absolutely asked for evidence. I just didn’t ask you for evidence. Weird that you apparently read through my comments and didn’t see that.

                And not one person has told me that they were personally hurt by this happening to them. They have just said that it is wrong.

                You show me the person in this thread who said it caused them pain. I can’t invalidate feelings that people don’t have. Someone not liking something has nothing to do with whether or not that thing causes trauma or any sort of psychological damage to anyone unless it caused them that damage.

                And now I am asking you for evidence. Please quote the person that was hurt by their parents doing this.

                  • Flying Squid@lemmy.world
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                    5 months ago

                    I do not believe that any more than I believe you are any sort of expert in psychology or understand what is legal or not legal to have on a phone.

    • Rekorse@lemmy.dbzer0.com
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      5 months ago

      You do understand that to cultures where this isnt the norm, it sounds ridiculous to show naked pictures of your child when they were an infant to, well anyone?

      It being a tradition has no bearing on it being awful or not. Circumcision is a tradition.

      I’m sure you can find a more modern way to embarrass your child without resorting to CP?

      • Flying Squid@lemmy.world
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        5 months ago

        Which cultures? And why do they get to decide what is right and what is wrong?

        Also, naked photos of children are not child porn. Do you think they come out of the womb with clothes on?

        I had to clean shit out of my daughter’s vagina regularly when I changed her diapers. Was that, similarly, sexual assault?

        • Rekorse@lemmy.dbzer0.com
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          5 months ago

          I personally have no use for pictures of baby genitals, but you really do huh? It even makes you upset we want to take away your baby genital pictures huh?

          Is this some perverse form of individualism?

          Edit: if you took a picture of you cleaning your daughters vagina out, and showed someone, yes that would be child porn and child abuse.

          • Flying Squid@lemmy.world
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            5 months ago

            Again- they don’t come out of the womb with clothes on. Are parents not supposed to take a picture of their newly-born child or should they put a fig leaf on them?

            I’ve asked several times- if this is child pornography, find me an example of someone getting in legal trouble for having a naked photo of their own baby on their phone. One person.

            • Rekorse@lemmy.dbzer0.com
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              5 months ago

              Were you even in the room with your newborns? Both of mine were moved to a table, cleaned up, and swaddled. I would have had to literally interrupt them to take a genital picture of them.

              But I guess where you live, they pause first and ask if you want a full naked body shot? Cool tradition, I know you love those.

              I’m sure noone has been in trouble for ONLY having their naked child’s pictures on their phone, but I’m sure those pictures have ended up in CP collections. I’m sure you have perfect opsec though so its fine.

              Legality as side, since its not the law preventing me from abusing children anyways, I’m arguing that its morally wrong. Plenty of immoral actions are legal from my perspective.

              Why does your perspective need baby genitals to be featured again?

              • Flying Squid@lemmy.world
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                5 months ago

                No one paused anything. My wife gave my mother-in-law a camera and she took a picture because my wife asked her to. Then we sent that picture to my father and my mother who was on a layover in an airport.

                I assume no one masturbated to it.

                And who is featuring them? Certainly not me. Have I shown them to you? No. And i wouldn’t.

                • Rekorse@lemmy.dbzer0.com
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                  5 months ago

                  And you can say, for certain, that noone has ever seen that photo without your permission? I guess you might have me here if its a physical photo locked in a safe somewhere.

                  Edit: although these had to printed at a business, where anyone working could have copied them

                  • Flying Squid@lemmy.world
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                    5 months ago

                    I thought you said it was my child porn collection. Make up your mind. Also, are you going to contact lemmy.world admin?

    • x4740N@lemm.ee
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      5 months ago

      Today I learned flying squid is okay with this kind of thing and that’s fucked up

      It’s a violation of privacy & consent