A few days ago i made a post about me starting working at a factory, grad has been very kind in providing messages of support and tips on how to deal with physical exhaustion and keeping healthy.
today, i don’t know what to do or to think, im one week in and seriously thinking in quitting, can’t take anymore, not so much about physical exhaustion, but mentally, even cried in the bathroom today.
and that is what is bothering me, how to come to terms with being so weak. im not trying to make anyone fell pity or something, especially when we still have colonies where things are hardcore and palestinians getting massacred.
like, idk what to do, i can’t do mental work because i can’t get a fucking job in it, and I’m not handling physical work, and confused about how being weak and not even capable of taking care of myself and handle a job, and be useful in a revolution or be up to the same level of many brave people fighting for the rights to exist, or something as simple as following party discipline.
sometimes i which i could just cease to exist, that way would stop being dead weight and not smudge the good name of our comrades.
edit: i am really moved by your kindness, i will answer each soon.
it’s not your fault that sort of crushing labor is poisonous to your soul. we’re all a product of our material conditions and yours are different to others.
i struggled a lot with work myself, feeling useless for most of my life because i couldn’t enjoy or even tolerate most types of labor that were available to me. there was no easy solution for me but it’s not an impossible situation to escape.
the support you’re going to get from your comrades on grad won’t be as helpful as support you can get from your co-workers or other people immediate in your life. when I worked a factory, we had union reps visiting throughout the week. even just talking to those guys made me feel sane, though the trade union situation in my local area meant they weren’t effective help, they were firm commies (that just couldn’t say so in as many words.)
thank you very for the message.
sadly there are no unions around, i do talk with my dad about it, he has some tips and tricks on surviving in the factory. may be a controvert take, but interacting with coworker has been taking a toll in my mental health, i’m not a manly man you know, everyone else try to be stronk men and lots of homophobics jokes around, that i don’t find funny.