• TheGrandNagus@lemmy.world
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        10 months ago

        I mean, for the subset of people who go to uni and can support themselves without also working a lot in that time, yeah.

        In my time at uni there was

        • work, at which the hours were inconsistent

        • coursework, which there was a lot of

        • constantly battling a shit landlord who didn’t give a toss about uni students and left the flat in disrepair, but the housing shortage meant he could get away with charging a fortune for a mouldy flat with broken windows and non-working appliances

        There was a lot of good, sure, but uni can be a very stressful time.

        • jak@sopuli.xyz
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          9 months ago

          I think a big difference is what the free time is like. I worked full time or nearly through college, so I didn’t have much free time in terms of quantity. When I got it, it was often with friends and during the day. When I graduated, I got a job with regular hours for the first time- I had so much free time, but I didn’t have a lot to fill it with, nor did I have a lot of energy after sitting down. Developing an active hobby helped with both, but doesn’t work for everyone.

          I’m in grad school now, working 30 hours a week, and I do feel much more weighed down, but I’m able to set my own schedule a lot more than I could when I worked in an office

        • Risk@feddit.uk
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          9 months ago

          I had a similar experience and worked a bit (not a load though) as I was lucky enough to get some support from the Bank of Mum and Dad.

          I definitely felt like I had more free time then versus now though. But maybe that’s just rose-tinted glasses.

          • PeriodicallyPedantic@lemmy.ca
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            10 months ago

            There is a big range between “parents could save up for their kid’s college” and “parents own a large successful company”.

            I’m just some grunt working an office job, but I’m still lucky enough to be able to put away money for my kid’s college fund since they were born. I hope that they won’t need a job to get through college, when/if they go.

      • eric@lemmy.world
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        10 months ago

        Not if you choose engineering as your major. I’ve never worked harder or longer hours than when I was in college.

      • ancap shark@lemmy.today
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        10 months ago

        If you can afford not working, yeah. That wasn’t a reality for me or most people I know. Luckily I’m in a career that doesn’t value a major that much, so I dropped out after finding a decent job

      • iesou@lemm.ee
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        10 months ago

        I had a full load of classes at uni and worked 40 hours a week. Not much free time was has by me

      • Sabin10@lemmy.world
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        10 months ago

        But university students manage to feel overwhelmed if their course load has them putting in 35 hours a week.

    • GissaMittJobb@lemmy.ml
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      10 months ago

      I always got pretty worried when adults kept saying that school was the good times growing up, as I didn’t have a particularly good time, and was not onboard for it being downhill from there.

      Luckily I’ve learned that it’s not actually universally applicable, my life has definitely just gotten better as I’ve gotten older.

      • chiliedogg@lemmy.world
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        10 months ago

        It’s different.

        It’s way better in some ways - especially if you find a good career in a field you’re passionate about.

        But some of the responsibilities of adulthood are a burden that is hard to appreciate until you’re there. And the perspective gained by life experience is also very different, for better or worse.

        For instance, I went through a breakup last year at 39 with someone I was fully expecting to marry. It was my first major relationship failure in decades, and as I was being dumped I expected it to crush me.

        What ended up hurting the most was that it didn’t hurt that much. I didn’t spiral into depression or fall apart at work. I wasn’t happy about it, but I was fine. A younger me would have been overwhelmed by the emotional toll, but the adult me was able to keep moving forward without breaking stride.

        And in a way that’s what hurts. The passion of youth has been tempered by a lifetime of experience that puts everything into perspective.

        • RGB3x3@lemmy.world
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          10 months ago

          Ugh, as you get older, everything just starts to dull. Things are less important, less passionate, and more “meh” in general. And not in a depressed way, but more specifically that I’ve been there, done that for most emotions I could have.

          I will say that now that I have an infant daughter, I’m finding those passionate emotions again and I’m excited as she’s excited and sad when she’s sad. That is the great part about parenting.

        • GissaMittJobb@lemmy.ml
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          10 months ago

          And in a way that’s what hurts. The passion of youth has been tempered by a lifetime of experience that puts everything into perspective.

          Ok, yes, I felt that.

        • SubArcticTundra@lemmy.ml
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          9 months ago

          And in a way that’s what hurts. The passion of youth has been tempered by a lifetime of experience that puts everything into perspective.

          21, and I am feeling this already.

      • lanolinoil@lemmy.world
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        10 months ago

        They’re the good times because you see you had no responsibilities and endless potential to be so many things, which becomes less and less true as you age. Of course, it’s miserable too not knowing what you are/what to do and feeling lost because you have no responsibilities, so it’s really just a grass is greener thing I imagine.

        • son_named_bort@lemmy.world
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          9 months ago

          Yeah I think it is a greener grass situation. Sure you may have no responsibilities, but you also have less freedom in school. You can’t live on your own, can’t drink or gamble or vote or anything like that, can’t go where you want, etc. There’s always a trade-off.

      • Fudoshin ️🏳️‍🌈@feddit.uk
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        10 months ago

        my life has definitely just gotten better as I’ve gotten older.

        I’m guessing 20s-30s then? Cos Once you hit 40s things start breaking and falling off.

      • ancap shark@lemmy.today
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        10 months ago

        For me, school was a shithole that I was glad it was over, those were not the good years. Things are not perfect, but they have gotten radically better ever since.

        The only thing about school that was good is that I made a few very good friends. Those are probably going to be life long friendships.

    • Pasta Dental@sh.itjust.works
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      10 months ago

      I just started my internship, and I have to say, it is so good not to have to worry about exams, projects and so on aftera full day of school and on weekends. When I close the lid of the laptop, the day is over. Plus I get smaller days, from 9 to 5 instead of from 8 to 5/6. I have never had as much free time

    • renzev@lemmy.world
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      9 months ago

      Not trying to downplay your experience, but uni was actually so much better for me… being able to focus on things that actually coincide with my interests and abilities in Uni was so liberating after being forced to go through five classes a day five days a week, most of which were either insultingly idiotic or existentially difficult… Not to mention having an actually human-paced schedule with ample time to plan ahead instead of constantly being in damage reduction mode. I remember thinking to myself in the first year of uni: “Is this what normal life is supposed to feel like?” I’m still recovering from school emotionally, but the fact that I finally have the mental space to recover is definitely a good sign. I guess you and I just have way different schools, universities, and personal circumstances!

  • EmergMemeHologram@startrek.website
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    10 months ago

    Yeah, that totally ends with school.

    I definitely don’t live in this state perpetually while I work with no summer break and just a few days at Christmas. Nope. Definitely not.

      • EmergMemeHologram@startrek.website
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        9 months ago

        I’m Canadian, where we market ourselves as better than Americans, but somehow I get more holidays when I’m working for US firms.

        Canada is a resource colony state and always has been.

        • Fudoshin ️🏳️‍🌈@feddit.uk
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          9 months ago

          The Americans probably think you’re a limp-wristed monarchist-loving Moose herder who needs his breaks to go pray to the King and chop wood. Don’t question it! The UK and Europe have minimum paid holiday levels, maternity/paternity and paid sick leave. Surprised Canada doesn’t but you guys need to do something about that too.

      • Toneswirly@lemmy.world
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        9 months ago

        Fuckin’ tell me about it. Its bad enough our institutions treat us like dogs, but then the Europeans like to come in gloating.

      • Daft_ish@lemmy.world
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        9 months ago

        I think what you are talking about is communism. Sorry, I’m not dumb, I know better. Excuse me while I donate my paycheck to Trump so he can make America great again.

        • Zink@programming.dev
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          9 months ago

          That’s why I referred to the overused quote and said this is where it actually makes sense.

          I even scrolled through the replies to make sure it wasn’t already posted.

      • Zink@programming.dev
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        9 months ago

        Oh yeah, it wasn’t exactly fun. I remember wondering how the hell adults do it since they have bills to pay and a bunch of other crap to deal with.

        But still, being an adult in general is way nicer than being a student.

  • boonhet@lemm.ee
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    9 months ago

    Work is pretty much the same, but depending on your job it can be way worse, or actually not that bad. I’ve had both.

    Started off in a repetitive job with highly demanding monthly targets that we’d need to hit to get our full bonus (which was a significant part of total comp, salary was low as hell). It was an endless cycle of “X more days until Friday”.

    I transitioned into software engineering. Ya know what? Occasionally I was EXCITED for the next work week. It’s still work and it’s hella stressful and sometimes you wish you could take the next 5 years off and have no obligations. But a lot of the time, you’re not actively waiting for the weekend anymore. Helps that my commute before I transitioned fully to home office was a 12 minute walk and I had after-work activities on weekdays to be excited for.

    • LwL@lemmy.world
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      9 months ago

      School for me was living hell for 5 days a week, working for me is alright and at least i also have money to use in my free time. Which I have less of of course, but even if school hadn’t been hell I’d never want to go back.

      Which is to say, if anyones reading this who’s still in school and is getting discouraged from people saying working is worse, don’t be. It’s very subjective and depends on your job too. If school feels like torture, work will probably be an improvement.

      • weeeeum@lemmy.world
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        9 months ago

        Honestly the worst thing about school were the other kids. Everybody are little psychopaths and are utterly ruthless. At work everybody just wants to get paid and no one really gives a shit about other’s business (YMMV though).

        Also there’s no homework, which is a godsend as somebody with ADHD. Just show up, work your little butt off and go home, nice and simple.

        • LwL@lemmy.world
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          9 months ago

          Yep, the other kids traumatized me for life lol. And they didn’t even hate me or anything, as I found out by them becoming generally fine to interact with in like 11th grade when they were 17+.

          The homework I was thankfully able to just flat out ignore. But that along staying up way too long and as such struggling to stay awake in class lead to friction with teachers, so once the other kids weren’t a problem anymore, it was instead the classes themselves. Which were also just mostly very boring and very slow, and I’m suspecting I also have adhd.

        • boonhet@lemm.ee
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          9 months ago

          Mostly the other kids, but I know for a lot of people it was the teachers (or parents and their attitude/expectations) too.

          There’s been exactly one school shooting in my country and I happened to know people at that school at the time. They said the teacher that got shot was literally picking on the one kid with a strict military father knowing he’d get punished any time he got bad grades.

  • ninjan@lemmy.mildgrim.com
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    10 months ago

    Spoken like someone that hasn’t been working very long, or if at all.

    While school can be very pressure intense around exams in ways many jobs aren’t you at least have summer and other breaks. For work you get vacation time sure, but it’s nowhere near in terms of time.

    Further adult life has a whole slew of responsibilities on top that you need to handle. Most 30+ can’t subside on the crap we ate during college, we can’t fuck off from our responsibilities when we can’t be arsed with minimal consequences and we sure as shit won’t find social stimulus without putting in effort, neither friends nor romantic. Sure if you live where you’ve always lived then you hopefully have childhood/school friends left at 30 but if you’ve moved then it’s not a given at all.

    • Overzeetop@kbin.social
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      10 months ago

      can’t fuck off from our responsibilities when we can’t be arsed with minimal consequences

      This might be the most (long term) depressing thing about adult life. Having a class for a semester or a year means that the mental overhead of a class builds up but, when you’re done, that demand is gone and you start over without baggage next term. Jobs build up that overhead, but it just never lets off, ever, unless you quit to take a new job. Switching (professional) jobs is similar to a semester/year end and - esp if you can swing a couple weeks in between - gives you that re-zeroing and that little honeymoon period at the beginning like the start of a class when you don’t have homework yet. The difference is that the switch often occurs on a scale of a decade, not a year.

      • RGB3x3@lemmy.world
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        10 months ago

        Shit, I refuse to stay in a job for 10 years. There’s no reward for loyalty anymore because companies will very quickly kick you to the curb when they determine their executives and shareholders aren’t making enough money.

        And raises are a joke. The best way these days to get meaningful growth is to move companies every 3-4 years.

        • Brosplosion@lemm.ee
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          9 months ago

          It definitely depends on your job and your industry. Coming up on 9yrs. Pay has climbed from ~$35/hr to $70/hr plus bonuses via promotions and yearly merit. Note that’s hourly so none of the “oh you are salary so you really work 60 hour weeks but get paid for 40” bullshit.

        • Overzeetop@kbin.social
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          9 months ago

          In some industries, absolutely. In others, there are benefits to staying or there really is 10 years of growth potential.

  • Agent641@lemmy.world
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    10 months ago

    “You are running out of ‘It is what it is’, are you sure you want to continue?” [Y][N]

  • rustbuckett@lemmings.world
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    9 months ago

    Then I suppose school really is preparing you for life. All this time I thought they were just teaching to the test.