Welcome to the Melbourne Community Daily Discussion Thread.
I have just realised how many things I haven’t done or potentially won’t do because they scare me.
With uni, sometimes I’m scared to try because I’m worried I’ll fail, and at least if I fail without trying, I’d have some control over it. I’m scared of losing my relationship so I haven’t advocated for my wants as much as I should be doing, and considered ending it. I will only do cardio at the gym if it’s busy because I don’t want to be around other people when I’m probably fucking up movements. I’ve always wanted to teach but I’m bloody scared to.
Today I’m saying fuck it. I’m going to try, even if that means I fail.
How do you know if you’re good at something or enjoy doing something if you never give it a go? I say to you fuck it. Do it. You might like it.
You’ve probably heard all the motivational shit that gets peddled in such situations. One thing that has stuck with me over the years, is that the best songs are about failures. Very few decent songs about successes. Seems to me that failure is nothing to be afraid of - it’s liberating and creative. And puts an end to that particular fear. You have already found out how crippling fear can be. Failure is nothing compared to that. Go forth and give whatever it is a reasonable shot.
I believe there is nothing more liberating than saying “fuck it” before doing something. Like you touched on, it’s accepting what happens next, rather than not bothering because of the potential of failure. You’ve got this, man.
“Feel the fear and do it anyway” I think that is in some movie but it’s what I tell myself.
One thing I’ve learned from transitioning is that as self concious as we are, most people are too busy with their own stuff and thoughts to even notice I’m wearing a wig and less then average make-up or indeed read my pronoun badge. It’s fun when I’m definitely passing and someone apologises for assuming I’m female when they hear my voice. It’s a bag of emotional stuff I carry around and there’s fear associated with it, but I can’t actually fail at being trans as much as other trans people try and make me feel like I am at times. I’d think I’d like to be able to pass effortlessly sometimes, but most of the time, I just make sure I’m being authentic to myself. What other people think of me is not really any of my business anyway.
Everything takes practise and we should aim for progress not perfection.
Apologies for last night, using this place as a vent for some of my trauma. I would hate to have triggered anyone, and I am sincerely sorry if I have.
The woes of waiting for a therapy appt, and being very, very friendless. I appreciate you who put up with my trauma-dumping, and I would not fault a single one of you who may block me.
I have spoken at length with mein liebe, he knows everything. But he not my caretaker, nor therapist, and neither is this place.
I will treat you better than I have.
Venting is part of therapy. I appreciated it. We are somewhat acquaintances and somewhat strangers which is quite similar to the therapist / patient relationship.
I overshare here and while its a journal it’s also because the people close to me have not been good to share with for the most part. They’re supportive, but most of them think I should have sucked it up and moved on by now. That’s not how dealing with trauma works. Not how the journey of being transgender works. Not how trying to come to terms with having neurodivergences works. Not how being in addiction recovery works. This stuff takes years and we all need people in our lives who have patience to hear us talk about things a lot over and over again. You’re welcome to vent and share as much as you feel like in my dms hun. I’m a good ear and I’ve been to dark places a lot in the past as well. Lots and lots of love.
Thank you, you have been nothing but kind and understanding. It means the world to me. You are such a wonderful, incredible human being. 💜💜💜
Thank you for the same things Spud! You brighten my days.
Waiting for an appointment is torturous. In the meantime keep busy. Have a look on r/miniatures for inspiration.
Well! I do have a killteam of Necrons that need painting, I could get some good painting tips there! Thank you kindly 💜💜💜
W40k fan too?
I’ve painted a predator tank in Blood angel colours but it looked pretty bad haha so I won’t be offering any tips.
Yeah, I bought the Indomitus box a couple of years ago (when I had a job lol) because I love Necrons and my partner likes the Space Marines (so original haha). I painted two necrons and never did the rest of the squad haha! I have a bunch of D&D models to paint as well.
When we bought the box at Games Workshop in the CBD, the clerks helped us with painting tips. We also have been to PAX a number of times where you can minis as an activity too. We are by no means great painters, but they do come out quite servicable haha!
I would love to see a pic of the predator tank you painted! I’ll find the first mini i ever painted too haha it was quite horrid 😂
I’m not sure actually sure what happened to the predator tank, I may have lost it when I moved.
I’d be embarrassed about it though. I remembered I used enamel paint because I didn’t know any better because I thought shiny was better.
Nooooo 😱 may it live on in your memories always! Do not ever be ashamed or embarrassed about not knowing! 🤗 shiny is always better 😅
I don’t know what they are but I ♥ miniatures.
You have nothing to apologise for. You’re human and humans reach out to other humans. hugs
💜💜💜
It’s ok. You sometimes need to do it and it also must be hard not having a proper outlet of times. Even I’m guilty of it I have to admit because I bottle it up too much.
You are a wonderful person who also cares about people too and you deserve to be cared about as well.
If you need to talk or vent you can reach out to us.
💜💜💜
Hey it’s cool to vent on here if you need to. The pitiful amount of therapy covered by Medicare is really some bullshit. One of my kids needed some therapy, has used all his appointments and now we’re paying full price until the end of the year. Really needs it, it’s not optional, and mental health is priceless, but at the same time there is a price on it that some people can’t pay. Constructive venting is therapeutic. Vent away, friend!
This is going to be my last vape. Vaping is a hangover from my last bender, which lasted about 5 weeks. Easier to quit booze than nicotine, the craving for booze comes after the first drink but doesn’t persist after I stop for long at all. Nicotine however is a different story. I have those lozenges to defeat the cravings and a plan to wean myself off them over a couple of weeks if I need to. 50 days sober today, so the end of vaping is how I’ll celebrate this milestone.
Only walked 4ks at work, so need to do another 6 today and luckily the weather is pretty perfect for it.
Amazing stuff! You are doing so well becoming who you always were meant to be!! Nicotine is a bitch, but you are strong! You got this!
Unfortinately I have a bunch of experience with quitting harmful things. Fucking drugs.
I have heard nicotine is harder to quit than heroin. So be kind to yourself, forgiving, and always keep going. You have my support 💜💜💜
Heroin is relatively easy to quit if you can remove yourself from the situation. If you can’t do that, it’s very difficult.
Maybe I’ll use herion to stave off the cravings… 😂 I’ve not been on the vape long this time so it shouldn’t be too difficult.
I’m glad you’re doing this, it’s a very positive thing for your health. Kind and encouraging vibes being sent your way 🙏
Have a nice day everyone
You too!!
Thanks, been doing that so far.
August? Why?
My dreaded birthday month. Just cancel it already :(
Well, they have to name it something. I do wonder why they picked a roman emperor though.
The gregorian calendar (which we use) is based on a very, very small but functionally significant change to the Julian calendar, the predominant calendar of the Roman empire.
I was like… huh? What? Noooo.
How does gnocchi with cherry tomatoes, zucchini, bacon, garlic, parmesan in a cream sauce with garlic bread sound? Great. 6 o’clockish. Don’t be late. Bring dessert.
It sounds delicious and my reflux is flaring at the mere thought.
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Succ the zucc
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Lol not ‘suck the Zuck’, silly
Succ the zucc 🥒
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No deal. The zucchini’s going in.
😍🤤
I have to keep a two week log for the council to do anything about the neighbour dog barking. Less than half a week in and I’m well on my way to filling out the first page. I left a friendly note (didn’t feel comfortable approaching in person) and they now seem to be leaving the dog outside longer & barking to spite me. What’s wrong with this psycho? If I received a note about my dog being a nuisance I would be mortified. It’s the dog that’s suffering at the end of the day. Going to try go bed earlier because come sunrise it starts up again.
my council doesn’t seem to do diary logs for noise…
5pm is log off and nap time.
I wish my boss knew this.
I bitterly recall team meetings at 5:30 pm at a former job.
Yeah lol used to have calls and presentations at like 10:30pm a couple of workplaces ago it was cray. Nowadays I stare people down if they set 9am or 4:30pm meetings
I remember international meetings at 1:00 am in the morning in one particular role.
I can’t imagine going back to that shit again. I’ve always envied people who can just do work at odd hours, sleep at the drop of a hat, and not have a routine.
It’s not really sustainable long term.
Oh look not everyday’s like this exactly so it’s certainly a treat. It’s also kinda like a result of a dysfunctional workplace in this case so not sure if it’s a good thing…
My last job ran until 6pm which was a major deciding factor in me quitting.
Aircon installation in progress. Mr Woof is not happy. Miss Meow is indifferent.
Edit: Now they’re drilling loudly on the roof. Miss Meow has ugraded to somewhere between alert/alarmed.
My dinner
Image of a bowl with gnocchi, bacon and vegetables, in a delectable creamy sauce.
It was delicious. I love how the tomatoes go pop in my mouth :)
I too would use the grater as a shovelfork.
Looks delish.
Mmmm grated lips
Creamy sauce. drool
🙇♂️ we are not worthy
Looks lovely! Did you make the gnocchi yourself?
Hell no. Hahaha.
I’m such a dumbass. I only realised today that Nullarbor Plain is Null - Arbor (ie no trees). My brain never seperated out the two words before.
Try the original name of Canada - Ca Nada - that is, ‘nothing there’. Well, might be true if all you were looking for was gold, spices and slaves.
Heh, some words we use sound somewhat ‘indigenous’.
The Yinyila Nation of Mirning clans encompasses the ancient coastal seabed of the Nullarbor Plain Ngargangooridri
I can’t say I’ve ever been particularly close to wanting to punch a robot before, but those FUCKING PHOTO MACHINES at Officeworks are absolutely useless. I just spent 5 minutes trying to get the damn thing to work, and I was going to print a fair few out. I selected about 100, and after 10 minutes it decided I wasn’t there anymore. It didn’t even ask me, it just assumed I left and cancelled it. Stupid machine
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Oh, yes I had that just today! I was paying by an E gift card thing and it wouldn’t scan the fucking barcode, and I made the mistake of leaning on the thingy trying to get the barcode to scan and it had a tantrum about it, even after I moved my arm
(Oh and also I ended up having to enter the 30 digit long barcode number by hand 😡😡😡)
Have you scanned your everyday disregards card?
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Day 6 completed. New steel caps feel awesome but my goodness are they heavy! Probably a leg and bun workout in themselves.
Im listening to the liked songs on the family playlist. My daughter’s favourite song ATM is Mr Blue Sky by ELO. My son’s is either Alter Bridge Metalingus (also my current listen) or Cult of Personality by Living Colour. Our playlist reads like a multi personality disorder!
Have a great day everyone! I’m off to make a truck ton of pizzas!
ELO, nice. So many great songs there to find for them. My dad used to play a single ELO greatest hits record all the time growing up. When I grew up, I randomly recognised a song (Telephone line i think), and I got a huge rush of nostalgia. Now on regular plays on long trips in the car.
You get used to the weight of steel caps after a while.
After using them and you got back to normal non steel caps everything feels so super light.
Pizza? I could go for a pizza!
Can you eli5 the difference between a shit ton and a fuck ton?
Congrats on sticking to the program. I only did 4k at work today and am feeling work fit, which is nice. Better hit up a decent walk this afternoon.
At work a shit ton is a little less than a fuck ton, which is the greatest amount.
Work fit is a great kind of fit. Great to hear it’s working out for you!
Sigh, I only get $93 from Centrelink and then next fortnight it’s $0, I am le sad.
Are you going to be ok?
Oh yeah. It’s 'cause I’m working now so I don’t have any working credits any more. I should’ve specified why I’m only getting $93.
Getting left alone in the office is terrible for my productivity, I love it.
