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Joined 9 days ago
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Cake day: February 23rd, 2025

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  • Ouch!

    My wife has CPTSD from being abused as a child. I got her on Prazosin for her nightmare disorder. It’s way better - but not perfect.

    I should have trauma, my life story sucks and when I tell people what I went through they mostly disbeleive me.

    I am from first nation descent in the apartheid state of canada and most “colonial” canadians don’t understand what it means…

    But all anti-depressant I tried just messed me up - made me feel and act very differently from what I usually am. I didn’t like it.

    So… How you holding up?




  • I have been diagnosed this year by a neuropsychologist with TSA, ADHD, Giftedness and Alexithymia. I’m a fortyish person who all his life though he was the most stupid people alive, yet have achieved a lot of stuff normal people won’t even try.

    I have a second degree black belt in Kyukushinkai, a first degree black belt in Tenshin Shōden Katori Shintō-ryū, which was delivered by Goro Hatakeyama. I have been challenged by my old teacher in Kyukushinkai to break a baseball bat, which I did, cement blocks, which I did and to do 25 000 kicks in a row, which I also did. I also did the 100 persons Kumite, which I stupidly did. I know how to brew beer at a very good level, having won a few competitions. I am a master code monkey - I have built the simulator for Janet Echelman, worked on both Unity and Unreal Engine, worked as a team lead in several big tech places, including the propaganda arm of Canada in quebec (radio-canada), worked at most known place in my province. I know how to cook at home chef level, being a modernist cook. I know about 65% of human history. I know a lot of comparative mythology. I have read a lot of philosophy, from plato to marx while reading and hating all those fake modern philosophers from the right. I have planned and done a 9 year TTRPG campaign in fate core were each played played 5 characters ( think post-humans ) I am taking care of two fully grown adult that are cognitively far worst than me ( my wife organization skill are abysmal and the anxiety makes her nearly non-functionnal ) and her brother who is a deeply autistic recovering alcoholic.

    So, when I was burnt out, my doc put me on paxil and then effexor and a neurostimulator. Effexor is shit for me, It mess me up completely and so I am on the third month of weaning - I get brain zaps and shakes and tiredness - been like that for months now.

    Now I understand I’m not that stupid, just chemically imbalanced.

    So, with all that said, do you think the neurostim is good for me ? My doc is a tool so I have to rely on conversations with other persons who have experiences that looks like mine …


  • All the people I know have internalized sinophobia and russo phobia. It’s pathetic. One of them was born in the USSR and thinks russian are out to get her. Her family is russian, dog gammit!

    I have been accused of being pro china because I was not jumping on the china bad bandwagon. My actual stance is that all organized states are bad and these people know it!

    I guess being from Apartheidland (no, the one in africa was the copycat) and having no culture of its own but american propaganda movie is some sort of an explanation, of not an excuse.

    But yeah, it’s anedoctally endemic to “liberal by default” people from my experience.