But now I’m lying awake, and I’m stressing so much. I’m really scared they don’t like me. I’m scared it was all pretend for the sake of being polite. I think I was obnoxious at points, and I said a couple of dumb things. I’m scared they saw me as attention seeking, like I was trying to be the most important person in the room. I’m so ashamed. What do I do with myself? I haven’t visited friends in a very long time, so it’s been very long since I’ve had to deal with this feeling
Some people will say “it’s ok to be yourself” and I don’t agree. Social interactions come naturally to many but not everyone.
Its good that you’re thinking about how those interactions went, and learning from that post-interaction review.
It’s bad that you feel bad about it. You shouldn’t feel negative about who you are. Look at each interaction as a learning engagement that you improve upon each time.
What you say is true. I agree, myself isn’t a good thing to be. But it’s hard not to fall into “Possibly did bad -> feel bad”