I’m in semester 1 of a Master’s degree in Mathematics. I have always wanted to be a math professor. It’s my dream to do that with my life.

And I adore my current professors. I love the material I’m learning from them, and I feel privileged to be here. But I have to work 2 jobs on top of being a student, just to stay afloat.

I took off work for my second job in order to make time for me to grade a stack of exams for my first job. However, when I arrived back home, I collapsed on my bed from exhaustion and slept through the entire time I’d set aside for grading.

I don’t know what to do. I’m on track to doing the one thing I’ve ever wanted to do, but I don’t know if I can make it.

I had a double major in math and comp sci for my undergrad. I could always just find a job at a tech company writing software, but it really would fucking suck to give up on my dreams because rent is too high for me to pursue them.

I was given an amazing opportunity to work for the University, and part of that involves me never having to pay them tuition. But even with tuition being a complete non issue (save for the predatory undergrad loans I have), I still feel like I’m drowning.

I’m beginning to feel like chasing my dreams was a mistake.