Lightning is a terrible protocol. The Lightning devs themselves state that it’s basically unusable and you shouldn’t even try sending transactions valued more than a few hundred dollars

FUD. I use lightning on a daily basis, it’s getting continual development, and millions are still being poured into development efforts. Some devs stopped working on it and now more new devs are involved, which is common with long-lived OSS projects. You can use it to send money to anybody on planet earth with a cellphone and a halfway reliable internet connection. In under a second. For a penny in fees. Try that with a bank wire. It’s a non-centrally controlled network, like OPs post is about. It does what it does very well, and it has been live and growing for years. Over a few hundred USD, you’re probably better off with a main-chain tx anyways as fees are flat instead of % based.

If you tried selling all that bitcoin, the price would tank

Yes that’s how market caps work. It doesn’t change that it’s a massive market cap.