trying to stop being so thin skinned:
I had an online discussion with a random, we had a short but intense exchange until he replied and then blocked me, robbing me of a chance to reply.
I feel hurt because I couldn’t reply. To me that means he won. I feel insulted and angry.
Yes, this is something I should talk to about with a shrink, but the therapist I contacted hasn’t replied yet, so I might have to start looking for a new one if this one ain’t reliable.
In the meantime I turn to the second best thing I can think of: this channel.
I can try to rationalize it: I cannot change it, I’m letting that guy live free in my mind, letting it go is the rational thing to do.
Except that here I’m not being rational, but emotional and I don’t know why this triggers me so much.
Not getting the last word triggers me. How would you solve this?
One is perspective. For me, most situations don’t fucking matter because no one died or was seriously injured. I have to deal with safety pretty heavily on a job where either one of the people I’m responsible for gets injured or killed or a member of the public can be injured or killed. It makes other areas of my life less critical.
Another way is reframing. He got the last word, but you said made him run away. You did more damage, what you said was more impactful that he had to run away. When you look at it through that frame, you won. On the other hand, you had a debate on the Internet, so maybe neither of you won.